How to Take Back Your Power & Regain Control Over Your Life
Life is a nonstop juggling act – with work, friends, family, kids, etc. – and sometimes it can feel like the universe is against you. This is where anxiety kicks in. Your mind spiraling and feeling like you’ve lost control. This is an unsettling feeling. But thankfully, there are steps you can take to regain that control and take back your power.
When there’s a lot of uncertainty in our life (which there usually is…it’s something we can’t avoid!) our brains like to predict. We are wired that way to reduce uncertainty, which is why we feel best when we’re in control. However, it’s important to accept that you cannot control everything. And it only fuels anxiety to try to control things you simply cannot. But for the things you can control, we are sharing 10 ways to utilize that control to get your life in order.
Here’s what you can do to prioritize your time and avoid burning out.
Take a step back
With so much on our to-do lists, we often forget to pause and reflect. In our hectic lives we get this tunnel vision, and the only way to get out is to take a step back. Take some time each day or each week and look at what you have ahead. If you find this overwhelming it’s always helpful to write things down. That way all the things you have to do won’t need to take up space in your head because you now have it on paper.
Now that you’ve seen what your day or week has ahead, it’s time to prioritize. Seeing that to-do list as a whole might seem like a lot. But when you can break it down and categorize each item by importance, it makes it all much more manageable.
Turn off notifications
When we receive notifications for every little thing (news alert, social media, texts, etc) it can be difficult to get things done. The more distracted we are, the less we accomplish and the more those to-do lists build up. So instead of letting the work pile up, try turning off some notifications (except for the ones that are necessary / urgent). You don’t have to do this all the time but just when you are trying to get work done or cross things off your to-do list.
Don’t be afraid to delegate
This is especially difficult when you’re trying to regain control, but it’s good practice to let go of certain tasks. Start small and delegate things that aren’t top priority. Because as much as we like to think we can, we can’t always do it all. And that’s okay! If there are certain tasks you can delegate to significant other, a co-worker or a friend, then do it. If it will take a little bit off your plate and you trust them to get it done…then it doesn’t hurt to ask.
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Address big patterns
Sometimes there are larger issues we don’t address that can lead to frustration with seemingly unrelated tasks. For example, if you and your significant other have been arguing and at the same time you haven’t been getting along with a co-worker. It could be that the relationship issues are bringing tension to the workplace. Although you’re typically fine with this co-worker, the dynamic has changed due to frustrations at home. Finding one connection can lead to several others, that could be avoided if you address the original issue. This can take some digging, and perhaps some professional guidance. But it’s absolutely essential, especially when you feel like you’ve lost control.
Make time for yourself
In the midst of all we have to accomplish in a day or a week, we too often forget about ourselves. You are the most important thing in your life and that’s something to constantly remind yourself. If you don’t take care of yourself, you can’t be the best version of you. And we need that best version of you take on all of life’s challenges. So when you think you don’t have time to work out or meditate, carve that out in your schedule. If you want to meditate for 5 minutes at noon everyday then make sure not to schedule anything at noon. Schedule that meeting for 12:15 if you have to. But it’s important for you and everyone in your life that you carve out time for yourself.
Sort out shoulds from wants
What seems to drive is in life are the shoulds. We should do this, we should do that. But what do you actually want to do? The shoulds tend to be self-critical. When you don’t do what you “should” do, you feel bad about it, right? But why should you feel bad about it? Try stepping back from the shoulds and replace them with some wants. This can be something small like wanting to cook more or something bigger like wanting more individual time in your relationship.
Make sure to set an end to the day (even if you’re not finished with everything)
When we have a lot on our to-do lists, we could keep going until all hours of the night if we didn’t stop ourselves. But it’s more important to relax and get 8 hours of sleep than to knock a few more things off your list. Make an effort to stop working at a reasonable hour. Whether you take that extra time to meet up with friends or enjoy some alone time, it’s your time so do what’s best for you.
Create a vision for your life
This one is broader and deeper than the others, but an important suggestion nonetheless. This is something you don’t have to do every day or even every month. Every once in a while when it seems like things are just building up and you don’t know where to start, take some time to create a vision. Where do you want to be in your career? In a relationship? With a family? It’s up to you. Don’t think about where your life should be, but where do you want it to be? Take this one step further by writing it down or creating a vision board. This way you can hold yourself more accountable and actually see where your life could be one day.
If you feel like you’re still having difficulty regaining control over your life, consider speaking with a professional. Schedule an appointment with Lyna Tome or one of our other skilled therapists today.
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Do you feel like you need to regain your power? At work, in a relationship or with family / friends? Here at Empowered, we’re here to help.
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