Parenting is already a journey filled with intense love, tender moments, and daily challenges. But when you’re parenting while grieving the loss of your own parent, everything can feel even heavier.
It’s a complex and tender place to be — trying to show up for your children while your own heart is aching.
If you’re in this place right now, please know: you’re not alone. Parenting while grieving is one of the hardest things a person can do. And it’s okay to acknowledge that it feels impossibly heavy at times.
How can I support my children emotionally while I’m grieving the loss of my own parent?
Supporting your children’s emotional needs while you’re in the depths of grief can feel daunting.
You might worry that your sadness will spill over into their world or that you’re not doing “enough.” But parenting while grieving doesn’t have to mean putting your own feelings in a box.
Start by being honest, in gentle ways.
Let your children see that it’s okay to feel sad — that tears and hard days are part of loving someone deeply. When kids see you feeling your feelings, it can actually teach them emotional resilience. You don’t have to have it all together. Just showing up, even on your wobbly days, is enough.
It can also help to keep small routines steady. Parenting while grieving is often about finding tiny anchors: reading bedtime stories, making toast in the morning, giving that extra-long hug. These simple things remind your kids — and you — that love is still here, even when you’re both navigating pain.
Finally, if you feel like your grief is overwhelming your ability to be present, don’t be afraid to lean on your village.
Friends, family, a trusted therapist — it’s okay to ask for support so you can still be the parent you want to be, even in this hard season.
Is it normal to feel overwhelmed or disconnected from parenting while dealing with grief?
Yes. It’s completely normal.
Parenting while grieving can make you feel like you’re on autopilot, just trying to get through each day. You might feel guilty for snapping at your kids, or for feeling like their needs are too much when your heart is so raw.
Please hear this: it doesn’t mean you’re failing. Grief is consuming — it pulls at your mind, your body, your soul. It’s natural to feel disconnected at times, or to feel like you’re only going through the motions.
Give yourself the same grace you’d offer a friend in this situation. Parenting while grieving is like trying to steer a ship through a storm — you’re still moving forward, even if the waves are high.
If you notice yourself feeling persistently numb or like you’re stuck in survival mode, that’s a sign to reach out for help. A therapist can be a safe place to process your grief while also talking through the realities of parenting while grieving.
What are some ways to talk to young kids about death without making them scared or confused?
One of the hardest parts of parenting while grieving is helping your children understand death.
Young kids process the world differently — they may not fully grasp what it means to lose someone, or they might ask the same questions over and over.
Keep your explanations simple and age-appropriate. Instead of euphemisms like “gone to sleep,” use clear language: “Grandpa died. That means his body stopped working, and he can’t come back.” This might feel harsh, but it helps avoid confusion or fear.
Reassure them that they are safe and loved. When you’re parenting while grieving, kids might worry about losing you too. Let them know: “I’m still here. I’m sad because I miss Grandpa, but I’m okay, and I’ll keep taking care of you.”
Encourage them to share their feelings, even if it’s through drawing pictures or playing. Let them see that it’s okay to cry, and it’s okay to laugh, too.
Grief can hold both — sorrow and moments of sweetness.
Above all, let them know they can ask questions any time. Parenting while grieving means embracing the messiness — you don’t need to have all the answers. Just being there, listening, and offering comfort can be enough.
A final note on parenting while grieving
If you’re parenting while grieving the loss of your own parent, you’re doing something profoundly brave.
You’re holding two big roles — child and parent — both of which deserve compassion.
This journey can feel lonely, but you don’t have to do it alone. At Empowered Therapy, we’re here to walk alongside you. We believe that healing can coexist with parenting, and that you deserve space to feel every part of your grief.
Parenting while grieving is an act of love — for your lost parent, for your children, and for yourself. You’re navigating something no one should have to face alone, and we see your strength in every quiet, tired, hopeful moment.
If you ever need a gentle place to land, to talk about your grief or just to be heard without judgment, our doors are always open.
Your grief matters. Your love matters. And you matter, too.